Happy Father’s Day
To Fathers, Grandfathers and Stepfathers!
And let’s not forget the fathers who have divorced
On this day when Dad’s are honored about 50% of all fathers in the U.S. are fathers’ of divorce. Often divorced Moms don’t encourage the kids to do anything for Father’s Day. In our experience often the fathers of divorce receive no acknowledgement. This fact often further separates the children from the fathers.
We need to change this. We need to pay attention. So often Fathers in my practice say, “awe, that doesn’t mater.” Yes it does!
All Fathers need to be thanked, remembered and appreciated. The role and teachings of the “father” must be held in high regard. Why? Because fathers teach and do much of what we as women can not do. The deep voice of the father’s command, the teaching of how to be a good sport, determined persistence until you succeed, order, rules of the game, rules of play and that special father’s kind of love. These things, these efforts must not fall away from our children.
What is that commandment? ‘”Honor thy mother and father.”
Mothers --divorced, step, bio --- DO NOT forget to do our job of taking the kids to get something or make something for Dad. Our world of divorce and remarriage is already too hard on kids. Show appreciation even if dad says he does not care. Do something anyway. Let him know you appreciate what ever he does do.
We know that the more we appreciate them, the harder Dads work at being the best Dad they can be ---- Happy Father’s Day!
(This Section could also be a Letter to the Editor) For Fathers’ Day
I want to thank all the Fathers, and stepfathers, who have been so honoring of my work. They listen, make their judgements and take action. They get results and bond once again with children who have strayed.
I thank the fathers for the many letters I have gotten years after we have finished work. “John graduated college thanks to you.” I often copy the letter and send it back writing “thank you, but remember it is YOU who did the work I could never do. So, John and I thank you, dad.
Fathers in my opinion have gotten a bad reputation in divorce and re-marriage. I find them faced with much more fears of and actual losses. Little did most know how much bravery it takes to be a good father of divorce?
Those are the thoughts for this father’s day. Fathers need congratulations on the hardest job that they will ever do.
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